That sparkle of excitement when you spot something new—a gorgeous plant, a bigger home, an ambitious project—feels brilliant in the moment. But here's what they don't tell you at the checkout: everything comes with an invisible price tag called ongoing upkeep. For neurodivergent minds, that maintenance burden can silently drain the time and attention you need for what truly matters. The good news? One simple question can stop overwhelm before it starts.
The Temptation: Why 'More' Feels So Good
We're wired to crave expansion. More space feels like freedom. More possessions feel like security. More projects feel like progress. The excitement of acquiring something new creates a dopamine rush that's particularly compelling when your brain already seeks stimulation.
But that thrilling moment of 'yes' rarely includes a realistic preview of the future. The beautiful fiddle-leaf fig doesn't come with a sticker reading 'requires weekly watering, monthly feeding, quarterly repotting, and constant leaf-dusting'. The bigger house doesn't mention 'three additional rooms to clean, more storage to organise, and twice the space for clutter to hide'.
Pause and Ask: The Question That Changes Everything
Before you commit to anything new—whether it's a purchase, a project, or even a bigger living space—pause and ask yourself one powerful question: 'What ongoing upkeep will this create?'
Be specific. Don't just think about the initial effort. Consider:
- How much time will this demand each week?
- What skills or energy will it require from me?
- Will this add mental load to my already busy brain?
- Does this need regular maintenance, cleaning, or attention?
This isn't about being pessimistic—it's about being realistic. You're not killing your dreams; you're protecting your capacity.
Visualise the Upkeep: Project Yourself Into the Future
Now take that question further. Close your eyes and imagine yourself three months from now, managing this new commitment. What does your Tuesday evening look like? Your Saturday afternoon? Your mental to-do list?
If you're considering a larger home, picture yourself hoovering those extra rooms, organising additional cupboards, and managing more surfaces for clutter to accumulate. Research shows that scaling up makes everything exponentially harder—especially for neurodivergent brains that already struggle with maintenance tasks.
If you're tempted by a high-maintenance purchase, visualise the repetitive care it demands. Will you still feel excited about watering that plant when you're juggling work deadlines and family commitments? Honesty here is kindness to your future self.
Choose Your Peace: The Power of Saying No
Here's the liberating truth: choosing less isn't deprivation. It's protection. Every time you say no to something that would drain your resources, you're saying yes to preserving your time, attention, and energy for what genuinely matters—your relationships, your wellbeing, your actual priorities.
Before adding more to your life, try subtracting first. Clear existing clutter. Finish those half-done projects gathering dust. Right-size your current setup. Only expand when you've proven—not hoped, but proven—that you truly need more.
When your maintenance burden goes down, your capacity for joy goes up. That peaceful smile in the final panel of our comic? That's what freedom from unnecessary future stress looks like.
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